179. Real Talk: Lynne’s Mental Health Journey - Lynne Wester
Today’s episode is part of a 5-day Mental Health Week series on the We Are For Good Podcast. Explore the other episodes and resources here.
Listen to this episode
Overview
Meet Lynne. Welp, actually, you likely already know her. And not just from the many industry keynotes she undertakes. But also, because Lynne's our first repeat guest in our show's history, and we brought her back to share a little-known story. And it's deeply personal, because it's her mental health story. And some of us may have been on the sidelines as it was unfolding. She wants you to know the signs and know what to say if you or a staff member experience something similar. It's raw and real. Pull up a chair. We think there's much to be learned from this shared experience.
Today’s Guest
Lynne Wester, Founder, Donor Relations Guru
“We’re all in the same storm, but we’re in very different boats. It is a journey and it is a lifelong pursuit to have mental health.”
Episode Transcript
Download Full Episode Transcript Here
episode highlights
Lynne’s story and journey to where she is today (3:00)
Lynne’s mental health journey (9:00)
Give yourself permission to make decisions that help you become the healthiest version of yourself (21:00)
What Lynne has learned about establishing and implementing boundaries (28:00)
The state of mental health in the nonprofit sector right now (36:00)
Lynne’s Blog: The One Where We Talk About Mental Health (38:00)
Something you can implement today: Do something disruptive every week to take care of yourself. (40:00)
Powerful quotes
“I think it's important to use our platforms to share both the good and the challenge of our lives.” -Lynne
“When I got up to speak, I always made sure that people knew that I struggled with the same things they struggle with.” -Lynne
“Coping with my mental health has been a journey for me, I have an anxiety disorder. I've had it. I've been diagnosed for more than 15 years, but I've had anxiety my entire life.” -Lynne
“And so you end up coping, coping, coping, but not really dealing with any of that. It wasn't until the stress of the job caught up with me.” -Lynne
“I absolutely applaud you saying that we are too often in nonprofit talking about our successes, but how in the world can we fix the things that are broken in our industry, if we don't talk about him.” -Becky
“How it manifested for me is unfortunately, I would get sick every time I spoke in public. I love public speaking, I have a gift for it. I didn't realize that my adrenaline rush, even though it was excitement, I have an anxiety issue.” -Lynne
“When I was a young staff member and a boss would send me an email saying, come into my office, I would break out into hives, my stomach would go into my throat and I would start getting sweaty thinking I was going to get fired because I'd spent so much time as a dissenter in the HR chairs apologizing for people's feelings.” -Lynne
“The business kind of got bigger than me and I had a ton of imposter syndrome. And I wasn't taking care of myself I was traveling 300 nights a year on the road, because whenever somebody wanted me to speak or a client wanted me I never said no.” -Lynne
“I didn't want to leave my apartment because I was scared I was going to get COVID. And whether or not that fear feels real to anyone else, for a person with an anxiety disorder, not to be able to control the environment they're in, and I have comorbidity, so to think that I would die of this virus, or that it would take my parents, that was an everyday occurrence, and I started feeling unwell mentally.” -Lynne
“Thank you for giving so many people permission to do the thing that makes them the healthiest version of themselves.” -Becky
“For me, self care is in the small steps that add up to the big stuff.” -Lynne
“I think anyone who's hardwired to be anxious, to take care of people, to nurture and make the thing grow, we're just going to take all that on, and we're going to take it in, and we're going to bury it.” -Becky
“I feel like an exhale like I'm sitting across with such a dear friend that I just so appreciate you being vulnerable and showing that it's okay.” -Jon
“So apologizing for things that are just self care and compassion is something I still work on.” -Lynne
“I've set boundaries around my time and my schedule. I've set boundaries around who can have access to me, I don't take un-scheduled phone calls anymore. I set boundaries around my inbox.” -Lynne
“You know, I'm here to serve as a resource for the industry. But I need you to have smarts about how to do that. And I've set boundaries around it. There's a way to approach people who have something to offer, and there's a way not to approach people that have something to offer. We all have value and worth.” -Lynne
“I think people are not being tolerant around this easing back into the workplace. I think people are not understanding of some of the trauma that COVID or not COVID has caused on our mental health.” -Lynne
“If you're a manager of a team, I encourage you to be having conversations and doing more than just Are you okay? Because if you would have asked me the day before my nervous breakdown, if I was okay, I would have been like, “Yeah, I'm fine.”” -Lynne
“We need to be more vulnerable in our industry about saying, every job is a stressful job, whether you're a gift processor, or whether you're the VP, and we got to take care of ourselves, and taking care of ourselves looks different for every single person at the organization.” -Lynne
“What if we did something disruptive every week to take care of ourselves?” -Lynne
“As you were telling that story, I just kept thinking to myself, what if we stopped apologizing to our people? What if we instead circled back to them and said, “I don't know if you're aware, but by doing that, you really helped me with self care and with anxiety and I want to thank you for being a part of that.”” -Becky
connect with Lynne
Website / LinkedIn / Twitter / Instagram
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