206. Next Gen Nonprofit Leadership: Embracing Empathy - Jonathan McCoy, CFRE and Becky Endicott, CFRE
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Overview
Loving the feedback on our latest Friday series discussing the next generation of nonprofit leaders, and what skills are needed to lead and thrive in this new pandemic world. This week we're talking about Embracing Empathy. Empathetic leaders create a culture where imperfection is something to learn from, not hide. As a leader, admitting when you make a mistake or asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s practicing vulnerability. We're still teasing a special guest appearance for this series later in Dec., so tune in early! 🎧
“We are all tired, burned out, and fighting compassion fatigue. Sit in the pause, think about our behavior, and move forward with empathy and a heart for others.”
Episode Transcript
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Episode Overview
Tone setting (1:40)
Embracing empathy in our leadership (3:41)
What does an empathetic leader look like? (3:40)
7 Tips to help cultivate + empathy mindset (6:30)
Powerful quotes
“There is a humanity piece to this. We are all humans and we are trying to figure this out.” -Jon
“We need to embrace imperfection. Isn’t our cause and mission worth failing along the way?” -Jon
“Value the humanity sitting across from you.” -Jon
“We have been hardwired to think that failure is the worst possible thing that could happen.” -Becky
“It’s admitting when you made a mistake as a leader. Asking for help doesn’t make you weak, it makes you vulnerable.” -Jon
“We can make progress faster because we are trying to embrace and support where we can fill the gaps.” -Jon
“If you have proximity with people who have different experiences than you, you are going to grow your empathy.” -Becky
“Create moments to check in with you team, and that is not just at your team meeting. Are you finding time to meet with members of your team 1:1?” -Jon
“Even communicating that you don’t have any information, it will go a long way. You need to keep a constant line of communication open.” -Becky
“Find a way to connect with someone on their level. Make sure they know you are fighting for them in their work and as a human being.” -Becky
“Giving and philanthropy is deeply personal. When we care about things other than the work, people pour into the work even more.” -Becky
“People are different, situations are different, and we all have different personality types. Somebody saying “they are fine” may be the biggest indicator that they are not.” -Jon
“We are all tired, burned out, and fighting compassion fatigue. Sit in the pause, think about our behavior, and move forward with empathy and a heart for others.” -Becky
“Your people have been working on year-end strategies, Giving Tuesday, strategizing for the new year, this is the time to create a pause. Are you celebrating the holidays or a great year?” -Becky
“If you have this truly at the core of how you manage people, it changes how you show up and engage with people. The connections that come from that are unparalleled.” -Jon
“When people feel safe and cared for, they won’t let you fail. They will show up for your mission and you as a person.” -Jon
“Leaders showing up with empathy and grace are the ones who people want to get behind.” -Becky
“There are only great things that can come from being an empathetic leader.” -Becky
TIPS TO HELP CULTIVATE AN EMPATHY MINDSET 👇
1. Ask Questions.
It is impossible not to have empathy when you sit down with someone and are present and talk to them, and truly listen. Try to block out everything else that is happening and zone in.
Ask yourself: How are you doing this starting within and expanding outward?
2. Seek to understand. Look for context.
It is ok if you don’t wear your heart on your sleeve. Are people quiet and distant? Are they having trouble meeting deadlines? If we aren’t so busy in our own heads, we can notice red flags. (And You might not notice the shifts if you aren’t checking in)
3. Check in with your team regularly.
If you are leading a team, find ways to check in regularly. Millions of people are practicing social distancing, and those feelings of isolation, anxiety, depression, and stress are beginning to emerge as large aftershocks of the pandemic.
4. Communicate, using all of your senses.
Look for things that are nonverbal cues. This can’t just be via text or on Zoom. We have to be mindful and find a way to communicate with someone. You can write a letter, send them a card, flowers, or whatever is comfortable for you. There are free and affordable things you can do to show someone you care about them.
5. Adapt your approach to different people and situations.
We don’t all have the same love languages and gifts. If you know someone’s personality type, tap into that and understand how to better connect with that individual.
6. Recognize your thoughts.
If you’re saying things like:
“I need to get out of this conversation as quickly as possible.”
“This person would rather be left alone.”
“It’s not my job to caudal people, especially at work.”
“I have more important things going on.”
“If I don’t say the right thing, I might make this worse.”
You may want to double-click and check on how empathetic you are being.
7. Set goals for yourself: begin planting seeds.
Regularly check in with people, see if they need anything. Find a way to begin feeling a little more comfortable with discussing emotional topics. Think about different ways you can provide support, even if it is a simple text.
Connect with Jon
Connect with Becky
Sources: https://www.newsweek.com/business-lessons-leaders-can-learn-pandemic-1634654
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